i’m so fuckin Rockstar i dont know what to do with myself







let’s play the sharing game. actually, fuck that I have more important shit than any of you to share right now so im fucking butting in line here.
instead let’s play the Pat Is Very Happy And You Should All Agree That He Is Fucking Rockstar In His New Shades. it’s easy, all you do is say “You look fucking Rockstar.” and I say “you think i didnt know that?”
you can substitute the word ‘shades’ with ‘you new Tossed Salad Band Shirt’ which is fully acceptable. I now have the most rockstar shades and shirt this side of your mom’s ass. you think there should be a MILF’s Beware warning there? meh.
i got in to the Public Policy Program for september. in two years not only will I have rockstar shades and shirt, i will rule the fucking world as a Jedi Master of Policy. and if that doesnt work I can go Dark Lord of the Sith on you. thats whats missing in policy you know, glowing yellow eyes and the ability to shoot lightning out my dick. not that im low on ammo. BA-ZING!!

goddamn i get cocky sometimes hah. punny.

my bike arrived in the back of our car along with my mom and dad today. they decided to pull a prank on me and say my mom had had an accident before coming out and that she’d spilt acid in her eyes and thats why when she opened the door she had on coke bottle glasses that made her look like Joey Moss. no offense Joey, you’re still the best towel guy in the league. so i said she wasnt allowed to make fun of the kid in her class with the lazy eye anymore. yep, true concern.

im going to wear my rockstar shades to the fashion guru’s show on wednesday. did i also mention my shoes are making an appearance on stage? no? well they are. my shoes are going to be famous. therefore when i put them on after i will be walking around in fame.

ive been giving the new finger eleven album a better listen. it’s starting to grow on me. maybe it’ll grow faster with shades on.

speaking of, i just ordered my ticket to the concert. so if you wanna come be cool with me then come to it too. its on may 14.

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