those summer niiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIIiiiiiiights

so today i had a hearing test. i can still hear. the lady went off on me when i said that like most people my age i listen to my mp3 player. seriously, this was probly one of the dumber tests ever. they only consider stuff at work to be damaging to our hearing? what about the 8 months between where there are parties and mp3 players and car rides and concerts and hunting and yelling and random blowing shit up?

she also said never to use q-tips again because they could impale my brain.

goddamn lady, it’s a fucking hearing test i dont need a lecture.

also mike and i ended up singing Those Summer Nights song from Grease cause it was on the radio, but before that id been singing the Cookie Monster song so i started singing TSN like cookie monster and it was funny cause when you go TELL ME MORE like cookie monster it sounds delightfully fucked up.

so then on our way back to SAP central we passed a squished kitty on the road right at the entrance. dunno how long it had been there but im pretty sure it wasnt there this morning when i got there. so we had to go pick it up to see if there was a collar or tag or tattoo. none of the following. it was stiff. and in mike’s words “it has that dead animal tongue look…mmlllaaaaaaahhhhhh.” the mechanics suggested a hood ornament. we thought they were joking til they told us about one crew a few years ago that had found a dead crow and wired it up so it looked like it was flying on the hood of a truck. dead cats cant dance. not unless you make them. k, seriously, you know i know how fucked up that sounds but its not like ive never picked up a dead animal before and when you have to put it in a garbage bag, which requires you to pick it up, and having seen the “Cat im a Kitty Cat and i Dance Dance Dance and i Dance Dance Dance” thing a few too many times….well.

now im gonna get the weird looks. meh. get enough of those already. anyway, there were no tags, no collar, and no ID chip after we took it to the RCMP to see if there was one, so essentially it was a random homeless cat that got hit by a car. is it sad? yes. but in all reality, it probly wasnt the only cat to get hit by a car today.

on the one hand it was kinda funny, but then on the other, seeing as how im pretty much more a cat person now than a dog person, there is that part of my brain that goes “dude i bet this was a cool cat.”

you ever notice how so many people put so much focus on dead things? and not in some like sick fucked up way, but like, people have no idea what death is all about other than the fact that you become dead, but like, people get all worked up and sad and start to wonder about road kill and get pissed off or annoyed at you if you treat it or talk about it in any other way than the most PC and respectful way in the world. i mean, dont real christians dont even think animals have souls? so why the random blubberiness about it? or what about people who think it’ll be reincarnated? dude, if it died and it went to be born as something else again, why are you getting upset that i threw it in the back of a machine with a shovel? if it’s dead, then it’s dead, simple as that. people really need to not be so serious about death i think. like, not have a party or anything when someone dies cause it is sad, but i mean, why get all fucking down and depressed for ever when it’s easy to remember good things and have a laugh about it? when my grandma died, yeah it sucked and yeah i was sad, but at her memorial people were telling stories and laughing and having a good time remembering her. i think thats how it should be approached more so than the staunch black and white affairs where theres hardly any noise and being there makes you feel like a piece of chewed gum stuck to the sidewalk.

i hope that when i die one day, instead of everyone getting all fucking teary and crying all the time, that they laugh their asses off about the stupid shit i did. cause really, i think a lot of the stupid shit you do in life shows a good portion of your character, and if you have a good time with it, then it’s worth having people laugh about it later.

that was a bit of a tangent there wasnt it. shit what was i thinking about before hand…

fuck now im gonna have that cat song stuck in my head.

11 days til Tool.

oh, if anyone has a spare IKEA catalogue that i can borrow…i havent got mine yet.


yeah i dunno. might try making another song later. i’ll call it Cat Shovel Fever. hahah come on, if you get in the least bit offended by a dead cat dancing, then you’ve obviously never read anything by this lazy bastard.

yeh..k…thoughts on the afterlife? seems like the next direction to go.

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